How to Deal with LGBTQIA+ Discrimination as a High School Student
You open up the doors to your school and begin what feels like a walk of shame down the hallway. Your backpack shifts and seems hot against your skin. It seems like everyone stops dead in their tracks and their attention toward you.
Your best efforts to stay hidden and to blend in with the crowd have failed you again.
The silence feels deafening. Not long after, it feels like all you can hear are laughs, whispers, and jokes being directed at your expense. At first you try to be strong. You know what is right and are trying your best to live authentically. From nowhere, your body begins to get hot. You begin to shake. Is it a mixture of sadness, or nervousness? Is it anger? What can you do but grit your teeth and endure it? No matter what your orientation, if you feel this, something is wrong, and we can help you.
Here’s how to deal with LGBTQIA+ discrimination as a high school student.
Build a Support System
Your support system should consist of your trusted friends, family, and other loved ones who are there for you, love you and accept you exactly as you are. LGBTQ Allies are all around you. Seek them out and let them support you out loud.
Leaning on your support system can help you not feel so alone and push away those feelings or thoughts of not being good enough. Don’t let people who don’t know you and people you don’t want to be friends with bring you down.
Your support system will give you the reassurance you need and help remind you how great and loved you are.
Get Involved
Join an organization or group at your school with like-minded individuals.
There’s a good chance your school may already have a group that supports other LGBTQIA+ students. If your school doesn’t have a support group yet, find out if and how you can start one. You can support other students who may be facing the same discrimination as you are.
Joining or starting a group at your school and connecting with other individuals can help to know you’re not alone and that others are facing similar struggles. They may be able to offer advice on how to address certain situations or find ways to cope that you haven’t tried yet.
Practice Mindfulness Techniques
Practicing mindfulness techniques can help you think more clearly. Discrimination can bring up a lot of negative thoughts and emotions.
Incorporating different mindfulness techniques can help you remain calm and think before you speak or react to triggers.
There are many different mindfulness techniques out there, so you’ll have to try a few out and see what works best for you. Here are a few different ones to start with:
Focus on your breathing
Start journaling and drawing about your thoughts and feelings
Take a break (even if it’s a walk to the restroom)
Practice yoga or meditation
Don’t Let Others Bring You Down
This can be hard. But try not to get stuck on the comments or experiences when dealing with discrimination and bullying. Those words are vile, but you must remember they have no basis in truth. Words that have no basis in truth are lies.
Thinking about the experience over and over again won’t do you any favors. It can actually make things worse. If you’re constantly thinking about negative experiences, it will only bring you more anxiety and stress. Words cause feelings. Words that are lies can cause feelings to and sometimes you need an ally or an expert to remember that lies are not real, so they do not cause feelings.
Use your coping techniques to figure out ways to better cope in the future. Try to come up with an action plan for what you can say or do if something comes up in the future. Having a plan in place may make you feel like you’re more prepared or more in control of the situation.
Find a Therapist
High school isn’t easy. If you’re having to deal with discrimination on top of the normal stresses of being a high schooler, it can feel like too much to handle on your own.
The good news is: that you don’t have to go through this alone. One of the best and strongest things you can do is to reach out for extra help or support.
Reaching out to a licensed therapist can be a great way to get all of your thoughts, emotions, and feelings out in the open. Plus, they’ll be able to work with you on finding additional ways that you may have not thought of to help you cope moving forward.
If you’re struggling with discrimination in your high school, reach out to us today to set up a consultation for LGBTQ+ Counseling.
Teens!
Sarah Niehaus, LPC specializes in helping teenagers with LGBT issues.