MARRiaGE COUNSELINg / couples counseling

IS YOUR Relationship in trouble?

Do you find yourself in petty arguments that seem to escalate for no reason? Are you having second thoughts about your relationship?

Are you having difficulty with feeling like your partner understands your feelings or having difficulties with communication, connecting or feel close with your partner?

Does it often feel like you’re living together, but apart, spending your life in the same house but too caught up with life: Jobs, Children and projects to make time for each other? 

IT DOES NOT HAVE TO BE THAT WAY!

Relationship problems can happen to anyone. It can make an otherwise happy life into a nightmare and make you give up on what was, or WHAT WAS,  planned to be, a very happy life. The chance to make it work better is right in front of you. Counselors at Orland Park Counselors can help you find the solutions you need to move back into a happy relationship.

Almost Every Couple Runs into Challenges...

Do you and your partner have the same arguments over and over without effective resolution? Have you started avoiding certain topics or even each other out of fear that conversation will erupt into a major fight? Do you wish you could find a way to share your true feelings with your partner, knowing that he or she will hear you, love you and be there for you as you work through your relationship issues?

 

 

Romantic partners and spouses don't come with instructions.

 

None of us are born knowing how to have happy, loving, long-term relationships. We learn how to have them. If you don't know, you are not alone.

Breakdowns in communication and a growing feeling of disconnection cause many once satisfying, passionate and close relationships to begin to fall apart. Once the “honeymoon stage” is over and the stress of life sets in things can change.

The first few months or even years the good feelings caused by dopamine can pull us along in a relationship and keep us feeling motivated to be the best "self" we can be. But when the stresses of life go from being a challenge we feel we can overcome to a mountain we dread climbing, our relationships can feel more like a burden.

We can begin to place jobs and responsibilities like children ahead of romance. While that may seem like a fair priority, you are deceiving yourself if you feel that way. Love exists as the glue of a relationship. The lack of balance in a relationship is the solvent that can dissolve that glue.

Doubts, insecurities and fears arise. As the disconnection begins, a growing pile of resentments and unresolved conflicts keep being pushed under the rug. The pile grows and grows, and it may continue to grow for years before one or both partners realize how much pain they’ve been storing and far they’ve grown apart.

Does it seem like some couples have it all dialed in and mastered? That is not from chance alone. Those couples have given it thought and been mentored with guidance and support offered through a special type of relationship. And, some of us really need the direction, clarity and compassion provided through therapy.

If you’re struggling in your relationship, or feeling sad, lonely or angry in your relationship, seeking help may be imperative to your happiness and the future success of your relationship.

Couples Counseling Can Help You And Your Partner Reconnect

find nonjudgmental space, choose kind words, work through challenging thoughts, understand facial expressions,pay attention to cues,learn body language, Understand your words to each other. address disconnections, realize destructive patterns, avoid misunderstandings

restructure your negative patterns, avoid going down the same downward spiral, stop destructive cycles, clarify issues, Learn tools, exercise your honesty, build trust, repair the damage,

strengthen your bond. enjoy more intimacy.

 

still have questions?

"I’m worried that our relationship is beyond repair".

I understand you may not have a lot of hope, but you are here...You are looking for help making things better.   Most importantly: GIVE YOURSELF CREDIT FOR NOT GIVING UP.

 

"I believe that we desperately need couples counseling, but I don’t think that my partner will be willing to join me."

Nobody wants to end up on the couch, but the reality is, we could all benefit from having a kind person give us some support. Couples counseling is best when both partners are present. Here is my promise: we don't take sides. We don't judge. We want to help BOTH of you function better. Perhaps we will be teaching you compromise. Perhaps we will learn communications skills. Perhaps we will be focusing on just one person's stress level.

What I can promise you is that we are not here to act as mediators or referee for your conflicts.

We are here to teach you how to resolve those conflicts equitably.

We tried counseling in the past and it didn’t work. How will therapy with you be any different?    

It is still within your grasp to have the love you want. We have our work cut out for us so to speak? Fine. Does it seem hopeless? perhaps so...but do this: Make this one last attempt to heal your relationship. I can say this: if what we are doing is not working, we will change what we are doing until we find the winning formula just for you.

          Motivation is mediated by hope and belief in your ability to accomplish what you want to do!

after counseling - couples/relationships are stronger and

                                                                                       happier than if they had not had this crisis in the first place

You And Your Partner Can create A amazing Relationship!

You don’t have to try to fix it on your own.  I invite you to call me for a free 15-minute phone consultation to discuss your specific counseling needs and to answer any questions you have about couples counseling.

Speak with a licensed counselor live right now:  (708) 275-0934.